The Idiot Tree

by Pete Jennings   Copyright 2018

The Idiot Tree (Arborus Ignoramus) grows successfully in almost any type of soil or weather conditions, and can thus be found in every continent of the world. It is a hardy perennial which fruits throughout the year. In the village sub species it may only produce a single fruit, known as the village idiot, but it fruits abundantly in larger metropolitan areas, mainly due to a nutrient rich diet comprised of fast food, media frenzy and social fashions.

There have been allegations that as a useless and invasive weed it should be controlled or eradicated, but the virulent spread of the species has now made this logistically impossible. It seems immune to Darwinism (survival of the fittest) methods and is now threatening to eliminate all other species by spreading into their natural habitat.

The only known effective predator on it seems to be Grumpus Agus Personus but their effect has been limited by tight governmental controls over biodiversity. Indeed, Westminster seems to be the most fertile environment for this pernicious species. There is a suspicion that the government has allowed a genetically modified super-resistant sub species to be developed under the secretive EM-PEE Programme.

I would appreciate receiving any further research data on this subject.

Pete Jennings


















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